One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
