Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
