What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
