i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
