Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize