I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
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