therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
