after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize