Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
