So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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