I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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