My room smells like vodka and shame
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
