It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
