Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
