Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
The beer is more important than you right now.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
