so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
