O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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