maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
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