I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize