yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Randomize
