It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Randomize
