Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize