Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
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