I like to think it a success when the cops are called
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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