Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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