You can't special order awesome
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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