Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
