What did we do last night that was yellow?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
