Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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