I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize