Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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