All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
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