saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
