I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
