I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I checked into jail on foursquare
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize