Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
