Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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