Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
