Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
