so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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