The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Drake has all the answers
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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