Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
