He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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