Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
