garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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