its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
