and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
they call him Oral-B. enough said
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
