I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize