I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
