So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
