Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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