The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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